19,030

366 days.

I shared 17,569 days of marriage with Susan. I loved her for 18,664 days before her death.

But sometimes the past 366 days seemed longer than the 17,569 or the 18,664.

I was never alone until Susan's death on July 22, 2019. I moved from my parents' house to my and Susan's house on June 15th, 1971. We spent occasional days apart when she or I attended conventions alone (usually because one of us had to stay with the cats we always spoiled), but the total number of days we spent away from one another during our 48 year marriage was less than a dozen.

"You weren't meant to be alone," Susan said to me once when she was contemplating a doctor's prediction that she had less than a year to live due to a chronic, debilitating illness (she proved him wrong by living for seven years beyond that—and even then, it was not that illness that took her from me).

I was certain she was wrong. I tried to prove her wrong. I failed, because she knew me better than I knew myself.

My therapist asked me, "Could you live the rest of your life without love?" I told her no. Thankfully, I never had to—I had the love of friends who saw me through my bleakest moments,  who shared my pain and sorrow.

Those friends led me to rediscover something I had said many years ago and have repeated often since then: every day, no matter how heartbreaking or painful, contains a nugget of joy in it. On the day that Susan died, Brett and Allison and Charles took me to El Rodeo for lunch because I hadn't eaten in over thirty hours. They reminisced with me of happier times when Susan was healthy, and those memories made me smile. Even on that day, friends helped me discover a nugget of joy.

I have experienced and endured all those somber firsts without her—the first birthday, first Halloween, the first Thanksgiving, the first Christmas, the first New Year's, the first Valentine's Day, the first anniversary,

With the help of others, I have learned that I can be alone. I have learned that I can like myself. And I have learned that I can love and can be loved. And I have learned that life can surprise me. I learned all of that in the past year.

366 days. But that's not the most important number.

19,030 days—that's how long I have loved Susan, as of today. And that number increases by one every time another midnight arrives. That's the most important number.

Fifty Years Ago This Week in West Rome - 7/6/1970 to 7/12/1970

New Rome City Schools superintendent Jesse C. Laseter ordered county news to conduct a thorough cleaning and repainting of Rome City Schools in preparation for the upcoming school year. Laseter had already gone on record regarding his hopes to renovate and improve school facilities, but until there were enough funds to make that possible, he at least wanted to make the schools look better. This would be the first time West Rome High classrooms were fully repainted since the school's founding in 1958. The school board also approved more than $20,000 for West Rome's 1970-71 athletic budget, which included $4800 for new uniforms for several sports teams.

With construction of Floyd Junior College running a bit behind schedule, there was a chance that some classrooms wouldn't be ready for the fall opening, To ensure that no classes would be postponed, the Georgia Board of Regents contracted with First United Methodist to hold classes in a portion of the church's educational building on East Third Avenue. The plan would allow classes to meet there until the facilities were completed, at which time they would move to the Floyd Junior College campus.

If you lived in West Rome in 1970, you undoubtedly loved Kay's Kastles, the ice cream shop in Gala Shopping Center. There was good news for all Kay's Kastles fans this week in 1970: to make it easier to cool off on a hot summer day, Kay's Kastles lowered the price on their sherbet pints to 21¢ each, while pints of ice cream were 29¢ each.

Piggly Wiggly had chuck roast for 43¢ a pound, cabbage for 12¢ a pound, and Royal Cup coffee for 49¢ a pound. Kroger had sirloin steak for $1.29 a pound, Morton frozen dinners for 33¢ each, and Country Club ice cream for 44¢ a half-gallon. Big Apple had fresh whole fryers for 29¢ a pound, Lenox Park peanut butter for 49¢ a jar, and Save-On canned biscuits for 8¢ a can (that's right—8¢ for a can of ten biscuits!). A&P had swiss steak for 75¢ a pound, okra for 29¢ a pound, and a 3.5 pound box of Cheer detergent for 87¢.  Couch's had pork chops for 59¢ a pound, tomatoes for 15¢ a pound, and Van Camp's chili with beans for 35¢ a can.

The cinematic week began with A Boy Named Charlie Brown at the DeSoto Theatre, The Boys in the Band (starring Cliff Gorman) at the First Avenue, M*A*S*H (starring Elliott Gould & Donald Sutherland) at the Village, and True Grit (starring John Wayne) at the West Rome Drive-In. The cinematic week brought the X-rated Female Animal (starring Arlene Tiger... and yeah, I'm sure that's her real name) to the First Avenue and the X-rated Gutter Girls (starring a bunch of... well, gutter girls) to the West Rome Drive-In, while A Boy Named Charlie Brown and M*A*S*H hung around for another week.

This week in 1970, Three Dog Night held on to the number one slot for another week with "Mama Told Me (Not to Come)." Other top ten hits included "The Love You Save/I Found That Girl" by the Jackson 5 (#2); "(They Long to Be) Close to You" by the Carpenters (#3);  "Band of Gold" by Freda Payne (#4); "Ball of Confusion (That's What The World Is Today)" by the Temptations (#5); "Ride Captain Ride" by Blues Image (#6); "Lay Down (Candles In the Rain)" by Melanie with the Edwin Hawkins Singers (#7); O-o-h Child/Dear Prudence" by the 5 Stairsteps (#8); "Gimme Dat Ding" by the Pipkins (#9); and "Make It With You" by Bread (#10).